Number

A kindergarten teacher asked her students ...

Teacher: "Who in this class who knows the number?"
Razif: "I know"
Teacher: "Do you know the numbers?"
Razif: "Yes teacher .. I have learned with my father"
Teacher: "Okay .. let's see ... after 3 .. how?"
Razif: "4"
Teacher: "Well ... after 6?"
Razif: "7"
Teacher: "Yes .. Well .. after 9?"
Razif: "10"
Teacher: "Yes .. Well done ... your father seems to really care about your education .... Finally after ten.... how?"
Razif: "Jack, Queen, & King"

Died Every Friday Morning

One of ICU beds in the room of a hospital often experience events leading odd .. Each patient will be placed there, died on Friday morning of each day regardless of age, gender, or their health This is very confusing for doctors ... Then the doctors decided to monitor the bed ...

Upon arriving next Friday ... some doctors prepared to identify the cause of death in the bed where the young man when a patient is asleep ... Some doctors hold the Koran as a preparation for Yassin and spirits drive ..

Spinning time ... at 08:00 am .. 08:30 am up at 9.00 am ... all of a sudden ... ... ICU room door was open ... . Then go Aunt Surgery ...A part-time workers as cleaners who only served every Friday .. Login ... approaching the sacred bed ... and continue to pull ...electrical socket for the respirator to turn for help .. vakum cleaner ...

Short Funny

Man: My father was great. He was the police. Everyone is afraid of him.
Ali: Hahaha, my father is more greatest. When he asked the subject, that person would be subject ..
Man: Wow! What your father working?
Ali: Barber.

Doctor: You should take this medication 3 tbsp per day.
Patient: Uh! Can not be a doctor.
Doctor: Why?
Patient: My house is only have two tablespoons.

Teacher: Hasan, connect 2 of this section into one. 'Ali ride bicycles to school. Ali saw the corpses. "
Hasan: Ali saw the corpses ride bicycles to school.

Moni: From this morning I was not full-meal satiety.
Sasi: You eat what?
Mony: Wind!

Egg Seller

Buyer: "Sis, how many eggs per kilo?"

Seller: "chicken or duck eggs?"

Buyer: "egg."

Seller: normal egg or chicken? "

Buyer: "ordinary chicken."

Seller: "The local or the imported?"

Buyer: "The local."

Seller: "The wish of the local Ipoh, Kuala Selangor
or Tampin?

Buyer: "The Ipoh lah ..." (As he looks upset).

Seller: "Want to Ipoh Central, West, East, North or South?"

Buyer: "You want to sell the eggs or the streets?"

Seller: "Sorry brother, I am selling noodles in the stew. Incidentally
The eggs sell out to eat. I asked to speak first to the buyer until he comes!

Can U Play?

A man approached a neighbor's house and knocked on the door ...
When the young woman opened the door of your house .. the man was asked ...

"Miss ... Miss can play the sex?"

Because the shock ... The young women hit the door of his house... However, the man would have just knocked on the door and
asking the same question. This time the young woman was screaming as hard hearts
as he drove his neighbor was not indecent ...

That night .. she was telling embarrassing afternoon
to her husband. Her husband promised to wait for the next rude boy
day when he comes again.

It was true ... the next day the same man came again and
knocked on the door. The woman immediately opened the door while her husband
while holding a gun to hide ...

The man continued to ask ..
"... Miss. can or not play the sex?"

"Must be good .. why ask this question sir?"
She said with a bold ...

"Good if you know ..." the man said ...
"Then Miss  .. satisfy your husband and tell him to keep away from
my wife! "

In The Hospital

Four people will be the baby's birth father is waiting for their break room of a hospital. Anxiety clear indication on their faces ...

A nurse came out of the operating room said the first man, "Congratulations! sir's wife gave birth to twins safe. "
"Double double! Coincidently, I worked at the iconic Petronas Twin Towers, "said the first man.

A few minutes later, another nurse came to tell the second man, "Her Excellency safely give birth to triplets. Congratulations!
"What? Triplets! I work with 3D Corporation, said the second man.

Half an hour later, a nurse tells the third man, "Congratulations!Wife of Mr. secure. Lord blessed the four twins "the nurse said quietly.
"Twin four! I really do not suspect this incident, I was working at the Four Season Hotel, "said the third man to be happy.

The four men began paced anxiety. The three men had surprised to see the fourth man. They ask,
"What worries you?"
With a whirl he replied "I work at Seven Eleven."

Papa and Mama

In the morning, a young man out of his room and asked her grandmother:

"Grandma, where Papa and Mama?"
"They are still in the room ..." her grandmother replied.
Child was laughing and then breakfast and then go to school alone.When home .. the son asked her grandmother:

"Where are Papa and Mama?"
"They are still in the room" her grandmother replied back.
The child giggled, and then spent eating tengaharinya and go play.At night then son had come home for dinner. Before eating, the child then asked her grandmother:
"Where are Papa and Mama?"
"Still in the room" said the grandmother.
The child giggled.
"Why is the last I just noticed you laugh?" asked her grandmother with a high tone.
The child answered,
"Yesterday, my Dad came into the room to ask for skin moisturizing gel, but I give her glue.. Super Glue!"

Celebrate the anniversary

While celebrating the anniversary of the 25-year marriage, a wife reminded her husband: 

"Do you remember when you talk to me, u want marry me, I was so amazed that I cannot speak for an hour?"

Her husband said:

"Yes, dear, it is one of the happiest hours of my life!"

Died Elephant

A manager of a zoo received a phone call about the death of an elephant at the zoo. As a measure of inspection, the manager went to the elephant barn and found there a man cries next to a dead elephant.

Manager: "As the keeper of an elephant, I understand the grief that you incur because of our defense when the animal is dead."

Male: "I am not an elephant keeper, the owner. But I was assigned to dig graves and bury them!"

After Die

Dinner that night last year, Ajoi hang in front of the TV while talking to his wife.

Ajoi: "When the brother died, whether not marry again?"

Wife: "Of course not! Your sister would sit with me. How are u if I died, u not married again?"

Ajoi: "Absolutely not, the same kind of u ... i will live with your sister...

Why Monkey Fall Outta The Tree?

Why'd the monkey fall outta the tree? 

'cause he was dead... 

Why'd the other monkey fall outta the tree? 

'cause he was dead too... 

Why'd the third monkey fall outta the tree? 

peer pressure...

Playing Golf

A husband and wife were out playing golf. They tee off and one drive goes to the right and one drive goes to the left. The wife finds her ball in a patch of buttercups. She grabs a club and takes a mighty swing at the ball. She hits a beautiful second shot, but in the process she hacks the hell out of the buttercups. 

Suddenly a woman appears out of nowhere. She blocks her path to her golf bag and looks at her and says, "I'm Mother Nature, and I don't like the way you treated my buttercups. From now on, you won't be able to stand the taste of butter. Each time you eat butter you will become physically ill to the point of total nausea." 

The mystery woman then disappears as quickly as she appeared. Shaken, the wife calls out to her husband 

"Hey, where's your ball?" "It's over here in the pussy willows." 

The wife screams back, 

"DON'T HIT THE BALL!!!! DON'T HIT THE BALL!!!!"

So Cold

There's an Ahmish girl riding in a buggy with her mother, and she say's "my hands are really cold, how can I warm them up?" 

Her mother say's "Put them between your legs, that will warm them up." 

So she does, and her mother was right. The next day the girl is riding in the buggy with her boyfriend, and he says his hands are cold, so the girl say's, "Put them between my legs, that will warm them up." 

So he does, and his hands get warm. The next day he has a cold nose, and they use the same remedy. The day after that he say's "My dick is really cold" and the girl says, "Put it between my legs and warm it up." 

So he does. She's talking to her mother the next day and she asks, "Mom have you ever heard of a penis?" Her mother says, "Yes, why do you ask?" 

She says I don't know what they are, but they make an awful mess when they thaw out!

Small World

Two men are having an awfully slow round of golf because the two ladies in front of them managed to get into every sand trap, lake, and rough on the course, and they didn't bother to wave the men on through, which is proper golf etiquette. 

After two hours of waiting and waiting, one man said, "I think I'll walk up there and ask those gals to let us play through." He walked out to the fairway, got halfway to the ladies, stopped, turned around and came back, explaining, "I can't do it. One of those women is my wife and the other is my mistress. Maybe you'd better go talk to them." 

The second man walked toward the ladies, go halfway there and, just as his partner had done, stopped, turned around and walked back.

He smiled sheepishly and said, "Small World!"

Equipment

A couple went on vacation to a resort up north. The husband liked to fish, and the wife liked to read. One morning the husband came back from fishing after getting up real early that morning and took a nap.

While he slept, the wife decided to take the boat out. She was not familiar with the lake, so she rowed out and anchored the boat, and started reading her book. 

Along comes the Game Warden in his boat, pulls up alongside the woman's boat and asks her what she's doing? She says, "Reading my book." 

The Game Warden tells her she is in a restricted fishing area and she explains that she's not fishing. To which he replied, "But you have all this equipment. I will have to take you in and write you up!" 

Angry that the warden was being so unreasonable, the lady told the warden, "If you do that, I will charge you with rape." 

The warden, shocked by her statement, replied, "But I didn't even touch you." 

To which the lady replied, "Yes; but you have all the equipment!"

New Way To Loose Weight

A fellow was reading the paper one day lamenting the fact that his
doctor has ordered him to lose 75 pounds. Next thing he sees is an
advertisement for a guaranteed weight loss program. Guaranteed like
heck, he thinks to himself. But lets see what they think they can do.
He calls them on the phone and subscribes to the 3 day, 10 LB weight
loss program.

The next day there comes a knock at his door, and when he answers,
there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic 19 year old babe
dressed in nothing but a pair of Nikes and a sign hanging around her
neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss
company. The sign reads, If you can catch me, you can have me. Well,
without a second thought he takes off after her (like who wouldn't).
A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has
his way with her. After they are through he kisses the girl one last
time and thinks to himself with a nod, I like the way this company
does business.

For the next two days, the same girl shows up and the same thing
happens each time. On the fourth day, he weighs himself and, sure
enough, he has lost 10 pounds. Deciding that he likes his somewhat
more slender physique, not to mention the method of treatment, he
calls the company back and subscribes to their 5 day, 20 LB weight
loss program. He thinks that losing 20 pounds in only 5 days seems
like a lot, but he is intrigued by what their workout schedule might
be like this time.

As expected, the next day there comes a knock at his door. When he
answers it there stands a 22 year old knockout dressed in nothing but
a pair of Reeboks and a sign hanging around her neck. She is simply
stunning, the most beautiful woman he has ever seen. She introduces
herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign
reads, If you can catch me, you can have me. He's out the door like a
shot. This gal is in excellent shape and it takes a while to catch
her. But when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. She is
wonderful, the best he has ever had. He is really looking forward to
the next four days... For the next four days, the same girl shows up
and the same thing happens each time, much to his delight. On the
sixth day, he weighs himself and, unbelievably, he has lost another 20
pounds. I love this company, he thinks to himself, I never knew
losing weight could be so easy and so much fun.

Feeling much better about himself, he decides to go for broke and
subscribe to the companies 7 day, 50 pound weight loss program. Are
you sure, sir? asks the representative on the phone. This is our most
rigorous program. Absolutely, says he, I love your program. haven't
felt this good in years! The next day there comes a knock at his
door and he enthusiastically answers it. There stands before him a 200
pound perfect specimen of a man dressed in nothing but racing spikes
and a sign around his neck. He introduces himself as a representative
of the weight loss company.

The sign reads, If I can catch you, I can have you.

On Elevator

A guy steps into an elevator and there's just one attractive woman in
it. He turns around to
push the button for his floor and his elbow bumps right into her
breast. He says, "Oh, I'm
so sorry. If your heart is as soft as your breast, I hope you'll be
able to forgive me." She
looks at him a few seconds and says, "That's all right. If your penis
is as hard as your
elbow, I'm in room 204."

Old Man

An old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he
called his lawyer. "I want to become a lawyer. How much is
it or the express degree you told me about?"

"It's $50,000," the lawyer said. "But why? You'll be dead soon,
why do you want to become a lawyer?"

"That's my business! Get me the course!"

Four days later, the old man got his law degree. His lawyer
was at his bedside, making sure his bill would be paid.

Suddenly the old man was racked with fits of coughing and
it was clear that this would be the end. Still curious, the
lawyer leaned over and said, "please, before it's too late,
tell me why you wanted to to get a law degree so badly before
you died?"

In a faint whisper, as he breathed his last, the old man said,
"One less lawyer . . ."

Aku Dah Tau Ape Aku Nak Buat.. Hehehhe... :)

Hari ni aku sedang mencipta laman web lain.. Penat ar layan blog je.. Bukan ade orang datang pun..hehe.. so,,aku searching web gila2 tadi,,aku jumpe la 1 web site ni.. seronok gak layan..laman web sendiri la.. nama laman web aku tu hairilnua.hpage.com.. so aku layan la..aku reka laman web sendiri.. kalo agak2 nak buat laman web cam aku nye tu,,buat la..tapi kalo boleh,, click r kat aku punye link ni.. www.hpage.com .. pegi ar test tengok.. tinggal klik je..aku x dapat duit pun..cume aku dapat la sikit point sebab korang register melalui aku.. tapi point tu bukan leh transfer ke duit pun.. aku pun nak gak tau brape ramai yang register melalui aku..itu je.. website ni  free je..xde bayo ape2.. takde nak primium ke tahunan ke,,ape ke,, cume,,isi kandungan,,aku brani cakap,,blogger memang kalah.. domain boleh tukar2..tap yang khas la...

Aku tulis website tu untuk kategori soalan2 dan knowledge punye..tapi aku baru je start ni..so,,belum ade ape2 yang menarik lagi..tengok ar 2-3 ari lagi,,banyak la aku letak..aku sekarang tengah gubah apa yang boleh diubah kat dalam tu.. tapi,,yang pastinya,,nanti,,aku akan letak la soalan-soalan berkaitan spmv ke,,expecially bab air condition lah..sebab aku ni kan dulu blaja air cond..cume,,slalu nye orang bila buat website,,dia nak buat duit,,tapi,,tujuan aku bukan la buat duit..website ni aku buat untuk bebudak sekolah tu haa.. tuk budak2 expecially yang belajar air cond la..orang yang tak tahu,,boleh la blajar sikit2...lame2 expert la sebab aku juga nak letak knowledge berkaitan air condition kat citu.. penat2 aku belajar dulu,,xkan la aku nak simpan je..lame2 beku jugak..so,,aku akan letak la kat citu..

Ok,, itu je kot aku nak info kat blog aku..aku akan update gak blog cam biasa..cume,,kali ni 2 dalam 1 la..hehe..eh,,silap..3 dalam 1 kot..sebab aku rajin layan halaqah jugak.. heheh..so,,, layan la ape2 yang patut..

Ape Aku Nak Buat Ekkk...

Aku tengah cube nak cari software photoshop free punye..mane la aku nak cekau..dulu ade..tapi cd nye kene rembat time raye aritu..geram tul..tu aku nak cari lain kat tenet ni..kat mane ek aku boleh dapat..aku nak melukis,,nak belajar melukis..mendajal orang,,hehhehe....x lah..aku ske lukis gmbar sendiri,,dulu aku lukis gambar aku bergambar dengan amy search..hahahha..aku duk kat bahu dia..tapi tu la..aku simpan kat pendrive sume tu....cd,, pendrive sume ilang..ade la sedara2 aku sendiri yang jadi pencuri tu..memang aku xhalal dunia akhirat la...cam gampang la..

Aku dah download bermacam2 software,, so,, aku boleh buat banner,,logo,, button,, dan bermacam2 lagi..nanti aku akan reka satu,,aku letak kat cini..saje membuang masa..hahahha..agak2 kalo ade sape nak aku buatkan,, maka,,minta je la nanti,,aku memang banyak masa terluang..tapi,,nanti la ye..aku buat sample..xtau ar menarik ke x..aku buat sempoi je..

Aku punye daya tarikan blog ni xbrape bagus lah..hari2 aku melayari blog aku sendiri..hehe..tapi aku xpenah complain pun..sape la berminat kat penulisan macam ni..kalo aku pun layan internet,,aku xlayan blog2 cam aku nye ni..aku layan game,,video,,ape jadah sume tulah..so,,aku memang paham sangat kalo orang xlayan blog aku ni..banyak blog lain lagi yang berguna untuk rujukan harian diorang..ade blog pasal kek,,pasal makan,, computer dan macam2..aku punye lak aku tulis berkenaan hal aku yang selambe..hehehe..aku bukan femes pun..hahaha..

Aku yang selambe....hahahha...

Khazanah Muslimah....... :) LOVE U........


INDAHNYA MENJADI MUSLIMAH.......

AKU PALING SUKA DENGAN GAMBAR NI.. DIA PAKAI TUTUP MULUT TU..HUHU..WALAUPUN XNAMPAK KESELURUHAN MUKA DIA,,TAPI DAH CUKUP UNTUK AKU MENGHAYATI KECANTIKAN SEORANG MUSLIMAH ITU.. KALO DAPAT BINI CAMNI KAN BEST..HAHAHA..TAPI KENE AKUI LA..WANITA YANG BAIK TUK YANG BAIK JUGAK JODOHNYE..ISH..NI NAK SEDIH NI..TAPI XPE..APE PUN,, SELAMBE JE.. LOVE U MUSLIMAH........!!

Antara Banyak2 Gambar,,Sape Lagi Power Buat kritikan?



P/S : Banyak lagi gambar2 dalam en. Google.. X larat nak copy paste..Tapi antaranya ni la yang den dapat taruk..Den taruk semua sebab nak bagi fair..bukan den nak berat sebelah..sebab gambar2 ni semua dah terpampang kat en. google dah..so,,aku letak la cini..hahaha..cume,,link untuk semua gambar lupe aku nak copy,,tkalo nak bagi big perview tu aku xtau la nape aku xleh nak big perview,,maybe silap cara copy kot..hahaha..Searching bersambung lagi lain kali...

Ntah Hapa Hapa Laaaa......

CLICK FOR BIG PERVIEW

Malam yang kurang menyenangkan hati..

Dari tadi hati aku x senang..rase gelisah je..ok..tu je..

Panasnye Hati........

Letih idup mcmni..buat ape pun sume x kene.. pegang hp salah..x pegang salah,, kuar merempit salah,, isap rokok salah,, mandi je yang x salah..so,, aku mandi dekat 7 kali pagi ni sebab ati aku panas gile..walaupun aku demam,, memang sejuk,, meleleh air dari idung aku..siap boleh sedut balik lagi...hadei....

Walaupun aku suka berdepan dengan masalah,,tapi,,bila masalah yang sama je,,menyampah gak aku..fedup aku cmni..mod ade,,terus ilang..mane tah ilang mod aku..sape la curi..mangkuk ayun tul.. rase nak ketuk pale ngan hammer je..tapi hammer yang de bunyi tu la..kat kedai cume rm1.50 je kot..

Malam tadi dah la mimpi cam cibai..3 kali berturut2 mimpi sama je..bukan 3 ari 3 malam..tapi 3 kali..aku tido kul 12,,pastu,, terjaga kul 1.30 pasal mimpi pelik..pastu aku tido lagi,,mimpi lagi,,bila jaga,,tengok jam kul 1.40..10 min je aku tido..lailahaillallah...aku tido je la balik..ngantok...skali mimpi lagi daaa...tengok jam,, kul 1.45 pagi!!..sakit nye ati..terus ilang mod tido aku..cube gak cari mod tido aku balik..amik rokok,,isap sebatang2..x tido gak..layan plak intenet,,buka fb..peeeehhh...lagi sakit ati aku...punca fb ni..cam gampang laa..ni baru je aku deaktivate aku nye fb..dengan nekad dalam hati,,aku xkan buka lagi fb aku sampai bila2..tapi xtau la bleh tahan ke x..sebab tu aku x nak janji..aku cume nekad xkan buka..siot la bai....

Ari ni aku demam teruk gila babi..tapi aku nak kuar gak jap lagi..aku nak setup moto gila2,,x penah aku bawa gila2 lagi sebelum ni..sebelum ni aku bawa walaupun cilok tu memang standed la kan,, tapi,,gila2 tu blum penah lagi..kali ni aku nak pangkah je ape yang dapat..memang kali nak cari pasal..siallllllllll!!!cam gampang..

Aku blur...cian aku..dilema x tentu pasal.. demam ni plak cm xmau kebah je..ubat docte pun dah bedal nak abis..kang aku makan 1 papan panadol kang,,mampos aku plak kang..blah laaa...

Mengenal Diri Sendiri Melalui Tarikh Lahir

1. Pemimpin
2. Lembut Hati
3. Kemas (Cerewet)
4. Rajin Sangat
5. Boleh berbincang
6. Angin Semacam
7. Patuh
8. Bisnes
9. Glamour 


Tarikh Lahir Den : 31 01 1986
3+ 1 = 4 
Maka kotak pertama adalah 4..

Kemudian campurkan kesemua nombor..
3 + 1 + 0 + 1 + 1 + 9 + 8 + 6 = 29
Kemudian hasil campur yang lebih dari 9 akan dicampur lagi seperti :
2 + 9 = 11
Jika masih melebihi jumlah 9,, teruskan lagi..
1 + 1 = 2
Maka kotak kedua adalah 2..

Selepas itu kotak pertama akan dicampur ngan kotak kedua
4 + 2 = 6
Oleh kerana hasil campur kurang dari 9 maka x perlu dicampur lagi

Maka kotak ketiga ialah 6..

hasilnya.. 

4 : Rajin Sangat     2: Lembut Hati
6: Angin Semacam

Selamat Mencuba.....!!
P/s : Aiseh.. cam betul je semua.. mmg den rajin..rajin tido.. memang den lembut ati pun..baik je budaknye..haha.. yang angin semacam tu..hahaha..betul la kot..den angin memang lain macam sket..hahaha.. Sekadar untuk hiburan dan melepaskan tension.. Bukan untuk ramalan nasib @ seantara dengannya.. Harap tiada sesiapa yang terperdaya dengan hal macam ni kerana Rasulullah telah bersabda,, "Orang yang datang kepada ahli nujum dan bertanya kepadanya sesuatu, tidak akan diterima solatnya selama 40 hari"(Muslim)

Kuang-kuang-kuang...Hahahahhaa...

Masalah Yang Berkaitan Dengan Jenazah dan Kubur.. (Syirik dan Larangan)

Adalah perkara serius yang menjadi musibah terbesar,, iaitu melakukan syirik dengan kubur.. Seperti mereka yang melakukan thawaf mengelilingi kubur,, meminta mayat mengabulkan hajatnya  kerana meyakini si mayat itu sewaktu hidupnya adalah wali Allah swt yang mampu memenuhi hajat.. Allah swt berfirman,,
"Sesungguhnya berhala-berhala yang kamu seru selain dari Allah itu adalah makhluk (yang lemah) yang serupa juga dengan kamu.. Maka,, serulah berhala-berhala itu lalu biarkanlah mereka memperkenankan permintaanmu,, jika kamu memang orang-orang yang benar.." (Al-Araf : 194)
Sebahagian penyembah kubur melakukan thawaf mengelillinginya,, mengusap dan mencium nisannya.. Bahkan sujud di hadapannya serta berdiam diri dengan sangat khusu' di depannya,, sambil meminta supaya dimakbulkan apa yang dihajati seperti menyembuhkan penyakit atau memperolehi anak mahupun keuntungan duniawi.. Ada antara mereka berkata,,"Wahai tuanku,, aku datang dari negeri yang jauh.. Jangan kecewakan daku.."

Allah swt berfirman,,,
"Dan siapakah yang lebih sesat daripada orang yang menyembah sembahan-sembahan selain Allah yang tiada dapat memperkenankan (doa) nya sampai hari kiamat dan mereka lalai dari (memperhatikan) doa mereka?".. (Al-Ahqf : 5)
Rasulullah bersabda,,,
"Barang siapa mati dan dia menjadikan selain Allah sebagai tandingannya,, ia akan masuk neraka.."
Kita jangan tertipu dengan seorang faqir yang menjadi kaya setelah meminta berkah kepada suatu kubur.. Atau seorang yang sembuh dari penyakitnya dan mereka yang dikurniakan anak setelah mendatangi kuburan..

Kita dilarang membangun masjid di atas kubur,, solat di masjid yang ada kuburan di tengah-tengah,, disampingnya atau arah kiblatnya.. Rasulullah bersabda,,,,
"Ketahuilah,, orang-orang sebelum kamu membangun masjid di atas kuburan nabi-nabi dan orang-orang soleh diantara mereka.. Janganlah membangun masjid di atas kubur kerana aku melarangnya.."
Juga dilarang membangun sesuatu kubur dalam bentuk apapun.. Dalam riwayat Muslim,, Rasulullah saw bersabda,,,,
"Rasulullah melarang mengkapur kuburan,, duduk di atasnya dan membuat bangunan di atasnya..."
Yang disyariatkan ialah mengubur mayat di liang lahat,, lalu mengurungnya dengan tanah bekas galian liang itu.. Tidak boleh memberi kubah atau tempat berlindung dari panas terik atau apepun di atas kuburan,, kerana Nabi saw pernah berpesan kepada Ali r.a..
"Jangan kau biarkan lukisan kecuali kau singkirkan,, jangan kau biarkan kuburan di hias,, kecuali kau rosakkan"..
Lihatlah mereka telah berlebih-lebihan dengan membuat bangunan di atasnya dengan nisan.. Apalagi zaman sekarang ini.. Pelbagai ukiran dan berapa banyak bendera diikatkan.. Mereka memperlihatkan tanda-tanda dan bendera.. Sungguh mereka telah jatuh ke fitnah yang besar.. Bahkan mereka mengorbankan sembelihan di sekitar kubur.. Seperti  perbuatan orang yang sedang mengundi atau di cekam ketakutan.. Mereka meminta dikabulkan hajat kepada yang sudah mati.. Menjadikan hawa nafsu mereka sebagai "Ilah".. Subhanallah....

"Apakah mereka mempersekutukan (Allah dengan) berhala-berhala yang tak dapat menciptakan sesuatupun? Sedangkan berhala-berhala itu sendiri buatan orang. Dan berhala-berhala itu tidak mampu memberi pertolongan kepada penyembah-penyembahnya dan kepada dirinya sendiripun berhala-berha]a itu tidak dapat memberi pertolongan.Dan jika kamu (hai orang-orang musyrik) menyerunya (berhala) untuk memberi petunjuk kepadamu, tidaklah berhala-berhala itu dapat memperkenankan seruanmu; sama saja (hasilnya) buat kamu menyeru mereka ataupun kamu herdiam diri. Sesungguhnya berhala-berhala yang kamu seru selain Allah itu adalah makhluk (yang lemah) yang serupa juga dengan kamu. Maka serulah berhala-berhala itu lalu biarkanlah mereka mmperkenankan permintaanmu, jika kamu memang orang-orang yang benar. Apakah berhala-berhala mempunyai kaki yang dengan itu ia dapat berjalan, atau mempunyai tangan yang dengan itu ia dapat memegang dengan keras, atau mempunyai mata yang dengan itu ia dapat melihat, atau mempunyai telinga yang dengan itu ia dapat mendengar? Katakanlah: "Panggillah berhala-berhalamu yang kamu jadikan sekutu Allah, kemudian lakukanlah tipu daya (untuk mencelakakan)-ku. tanpa memberi tangguh (kepada-ku)". Sesungguhnya pelindungku ialahlah Yang telah menurunkan Al Kitab (Al Quran) dan Dia melindungi orang-orang yang saleh. Dan berhala-berhala yang kamu seru selain Allah tidaklah sanggup menolongmu, bahkan tidak dapat menolong dirinya sendiri. Dan jika kamu sekalian menyeru (berhala-berhala) untuk memberi petunjuk, niscaya berhala-herhala itu tidak dapat mendengarnya. Dan kamu melihat berhala-berhala itu memandang kepadamu padahal ia tidak melihat." (Al-Araf : 191 - 198)

Masalah Yang Berkaitan Dengan Jenazah dan Kubur.. (Mengirim Pahala)

Kerabat handai mayat boleh melakukan ibadah tertentu dengan bermaksud ingin mengirimkan pahalanya kepada mayat selama batas yang diboleh kan oleh syariat Islam.. Sepeti berdoa,, berhaji,, umrah,, sedekah dan berqurban untuknya.. Demikian juga membayar hutang puasa untuk si mayat..
Adapun yang tidak diperbolehkan adalah melakukan solat dengan maksud pahala solat itu ditujukan kepada si mayat.. Demikian pula tidak boleh mengupah orang untuk membaca al-Qur'an yang pahalanya dikirimkan kepada mayat.. Hal tersebut tidak pernah dilakukan Rasulullah saw..

Masalah Yang Berkaitan Dengan Jenazah dan Kubur.. (Bid'ah)

Bentuk-bentuk bid'ah dan yang berlawanan dengan syariat Islam..

  • Meletakkan / menaburkan bunga pada jenazah atau kuburan.. Perbuatan ini menyerupai orang-orang kafir.. Padahal Rasulullah saw bersabda,, "Barangsiapa menyerupai sesuatu kaum,, dia termasuk di kalangan kaum itu.." (H.R. Ahmad)
  • Menghormati arwah para pahlawan dan lainnya dengan membina patung yang menyerupainya.. Ini adalah bid'ah yang sangat mungkar.. Penghormatan baginya cukup dengan doa dan memohonkan keampunan baginya..
  • Mengadakan tahlil atau takbir beramai-ramai dengan suara tinggi berkenaan dengan seseorang yang meninggal dunia.. Yang disyariatkan adalah doa dan dzikir..
  • Azan di dalam kubur atau setelah meletakkan jenazah di liang lahat.. Ini tidak pernah dilakukan oleh Rasulullah saw dan juga para sahabat.. Padahal beliau telah bersabda,, "Barangsiapa membuat perkara baru dalam agama ini,, padahal bukan dari sebahagian dari agama (Islam) nya,, ia ditolak.."
  • Menguburkan mayat dengan peti.. Seharusnya mayat dikubur secara langsung dengan kain kafan,, tanpa peti.. Kecuali pabila terjadi sesuatu yang memerlukan mayat di letakkan di dalam peti seperti,, anggota tubuh badan yang telah terpotong,, pecah atau peraturan sesebuah negara yang mewajibkan penggunaan peti dan tidak boleh untuk mengubahnya,, barulah penggunaan peti dibolehkan.

Masalah Yang Berkaitan Dengan Jenazah dan Kubur.. [Ziarah Kubur]

Ziarah kubur disyariatkan dalam Islam.. Tujuannya untuk mengambil I'tibar dan peringatan darinya.. Bukan bermaksud seperti mencari keuntungan,, menganggap kubur itu keramat dan untuk mencapai tujuan tertentu..

Tidak boleh mengkhususkan ziarah kubur pada hari tertentu,, kerana hal itu tidak pernah dilakukan oleh Rasulullah saw.. Beliau bersabda..
"Barangsiapa membuat perkara baru dalam agama ini,, padahal bukan dari sebahagian dari agama (Islam) nya,, ia ditolak.."
Sebahagian orang membaca Al-Fatihah di kuburan.. Ini adalah bid'ah,, kerana Rasulullah saw tidak pernah membaca apapun di kuburan.. Yang beliau lakukan hanyalah berdoa untuk si mayat dan meminta ampun baginya..

Tidak boleh mengadakan suatu perjalanan khusus (dalam jarak jauh) untuk menziarahi kubur.. Rasulullah saw bersabda,,
"Janganlah kalian bersusah payah mengadakan suatu perjalanan kecuali ke tiga tempat : Masjidil Haram,, Masjid Nabawi dan Masjidil Aqsa.." (Muttafaqun Alaih)

Kuburan Itu Memanggil Ku...

Suatu ketika,, Umar bin Abdul Aziz r.a mengurusi jenazah keluarganya.. Ketika mayat telah ditanam ke liang lahat dan tanah sudah dimampatkan,, Umar menghadap orang-orang yang bertakziah sambil berkata,, "Sesungguhnya kuburan ini memanggilku dari belakang.. Mahukah kalian aku beritahu apa yang ia katakan kepadaku?"..

Mereka menjawab,, "Tentu.." Umar pun berkata,, "Kuburan itu memanggilku dan berkata,, "Wahai Umar bin Abdul Aziz,, mahukah ku beritahu apa yang akan aku perbuat dengan orang yang engkau cintai ini?" "Tentu,," jawabku..
Kuburan itu berkata,, "Aku bakar kafannya,, ku robek badannya dan ku sedut darahnya serta ku kunyah dagingnya.. Mahukah kau ku beritahu apa yang ku perbuat dengan anggota badannya?" "Tentu,," jawabku.. "Aku cabut satu persatu dari telapak tangannya,, lalu dari tangan ke lengan,, dan dari lengan menuju ke bahu.. Lalu ku cabut pula lutut itu dari pehanya.. Dan peha dari lututnya.. Ku cabut pula lutut itu dari betis.. Dan dari betis menuju ke telapak kakinya...!!"

Akhirnya......... No Komen...

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